You just spent months – or longer! – planning the wedding of your dreams. You found the dress, tasted the cake, picked out the rings, and wrote and practiced your vows. You walked down that aisle like the regal wedded goddess (or god) that you are. You clinked those champagne flutes, danced that first dance, and tossed that bouquet like Kyle Hendricks at the 2016 World Series.

Then, you swapped out those dancing shoes for some comfy travel flats, grabbed your pre-packed bags, and hit the road. Whether you backpacked across Europe, ate your way through Asia, camped Sequoia, or cruised the Caribbean, I’m sure you had tons of fun, relaxation, and romance. When it came to newlywedded bliss, there is no doubt you and your brand-new spouse rocked that just-married glow from sun up to sun down.

Jet-lagged, road-weary, but happy, you have returned home, dropped your travel-worn luggage inside the front door, looked into one another’s eyes, and thought…now what? That’s actually a really great question – plenty of newlywed couples ask themselves once all the fuss, commotion, planning, and celebration has died down: What does come after the wedding and the honeymoon? Now that the events that have consumed so much of your relationship (and time) for so long are over, how do you get back to your everyday relationship and start building the rest of your lives together?

If building the rest of your lives together suddenly sounds like a lot of pressure, don’t worry: you’re not alone. When it comes to planning a wedding and honeymoon, there’s a pretty clear blueprint that most couples follow, to one degree or another. But when it comes to building your very own lives? There is no one-size-fits-all plan. It turns out that the childhood song lyric, “first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes a baby in a baby carriage” is missing a whole lot of steps. Like, “open a joint checking account” and “buy a house” and “wash all the honeymoon laundry.”

The good news is, unlike planning your wedding and all the other related festivities, you have more than a few hectic and tulle-filled months to plan the rest of your lives. And you definitely don’t have to start planning right away. In fact, unless you absolutely have to make another major transition immediately (like moving for someone’s job or actually buying that house) my best advice is to take a few weeks – even a few months – to do a whole lot of nothing at all.

If you weren’t already living together before the wedding, now is the time to focus on finding your groove as newlyweds and getting familiar with all those quirks your pre-wedded selves were totally oblivious to. (Buckle up and hold on tight to your sense of humor, because chances are there will be a lot of them.) If you have already been coupled up and cohabitating for years, then just take your much-deserved time to enjoy any new feelings or dynamics that marriage might bring into the equation. Be sure to finally open those wedding gifts and write those thank-you notes, take some time for quiet dinners at home, and slowly start getting back into your regularly scheduled routines of grabbing your morning lattes, going to work, hitting the gym, hanging out with friends, and just being yourselves again.

Shortly after our own wedding, my spouse and I started a new tradition. We decide on a goal or theme each year of our marriage. Sounds cheesy, I know, but hear me out. The theme for our first year consisted of spending as much time in our bedroom as possible, sleeping! We were still exhausted from the whole “getting married” thing. Since then we have had a year dedicated to taking a different road trip each month, a year committed to taking one hike every weekend, a year dedicated to saving money, a year dedicated to getting healthier together, and a year when we focused on starting our family. Having something clear and fun to collaborate on, has definitely helped keep our relationship fresh, exciting, and centered around us achieving our goals as a team. Maybe you and your spouse have a five-year dream of buying a house, taking some time to live abroad together, paying off one of your student loans, or starting a family of your own. Figure out what small steps you can take now, in order to reach your goal(s) by your desired deadline. Don’t be afraid to be flexible with your plans – after all, sometimes life just happens!

The flipside of all that teamwork is that my husband and I are also mindful of spending time (like, plenty of time) apart as well. One of the best pieces of marriage advice I’ve ever received was: “take vacations by yourself”. My best friend and I have celebrated by having an annual girls’ weekend – seriously, no boys allowed, no exceptions – every year since I got married. Both my husband and I make time to visit our families separately, at least once a year. (Hey, sometimes you just really need that mother/daughter time.) We nurture our own hobbies, have our own friends, and are honest about those times when we each need to prioritize ourselves as individuals over ourselves as a team. If you and your new spouse do need to jump into another major transition immediately post-wedding – buying a house, moving to a new city, starting a new job, taking on a recent promotion – be gentle with yourselves as you adjust to yet another life milestone together. When possible, still prioritize time to celebrate your recent union and find a way to integrate the “everyday” things you love to do into your still-hectic lives: cooking dinner together, visiting your favorite Saturday morning farmers’ market, checking out the nearby coffee shops in your new neighborhood or city, hitting the gym together, or even just doing a quick check-in with each other in the evenings.

Remember, even positive life transitions such as marriage, great job, new house, and travel adventures can all add stress to the best relationships. After the emotional highs of a wedding and honeymoon, returning to regular life can feel a little underwhelming. Set aside time to communicate your feelings with one another, reconnect with your shared goals, and plan an afternoon to catch up on that Netflix queue as soon as both of you can slow things down a bit. Everything you’re experiencing is totally normal – and consider reaching out to friends and fellow couples who have been exactly where you are, before. At the end of the day, you and your spouse probably got married because you already know how to best support one another: bolstering each other’s spirits in times of stress, celebrating each other in times of success, leaning on one another in times of transition, and loving one another through it all.

Written by Katie O’Shaughnessy | Photography by TWA Photographic Artists

Right now your mind is swirling with all the unique things you want to pack into your wedding day. Your heart may be set on the grandest, most beautiful dress money can buy or a menagerie of whimsical peacocks performing a tightly choreographed show tune. But let’s just calm down here, set that aside, and take a step into the future for a minute.

It’s likely that something small will go wrong despite your best intentions, but if you go with the flow and find the humor in it, you’ll come to appreciate the minor glitch from the day you got hitched. That said, you can still take action to limit the likelihood of potential regrets. Here’s how.

WHO’S THE BOSS?

When it comes to a big, creative event like this, everyone has an opinion, which is not necessarily a bad thing. Listen to others while still keeping your own desires at the forefront of your planning.

Family members often seem to have their own ideas of how your wedding should go. Whether they envision something more traditional than you’d like or something built from their wildly overactive imaginations, they need to know that you and your partner make the final decisions. Being direct from the beginning will keep you from being pushed around, but be kind. Remember that they just want the best for you, and any “help” they offer is out of love.

And of course, everyone wants their wedding guests to leave their big day happy. After all, they took the time out of their busy lives to celebrate your wedding. However, while you should make your guests’ happiness a priority, you’re undoubtedly going to worry too much about what would please them, and not enough about how you and your spouse want to spend your day. Chances are your guests are just happy to be included and celebrate with you. Make them feel special, but make sure you and your partner are happy, too.

FINISH YOUR GUEST LIST

Formulating a solid guest list early in the process removes a significant amount of stress. Knowing how many people may attend your wedding makes it so much easier to design nearly every other detail.

Your guest list can help determine how many tables and centerpieces you need, what size cake you want, how large your dance floor should be and what your budget is per plate. Getting the logistics down early saves a lot of time — and many headaches — in the long run.

DIY AT YOUR OWN RISK

DIY décor and favors may seem like an amazing idea right now, but they’re also a ton of work, super time-consuming and definitely not as budget-friendly as you think. All those raw birch tree slices cost money and they don’t personalize themselves. Your attendants love you to death, otherwise they wouldn’t be by your side through this exciting process, but they can only tolerate so much. If you ask them to bundle 500 packets of home-dried herbs in individually- cut, hot-glued, hand-addressed tea bag sachets, they might leave you at the altar.

UNCLE HARRY IS A VERY AMATEUR PHOTOGRAPHER

Just because a family member owns a fancy camera, doesn’t mean they know how to use a fancy camera. Professionals have taken classes and honed their professional skills, and it’s in your best interest to hire one. Plus, you want Uncle Harry to be burning up the dance floor with Aunt Sheila.

Look at several photographers’ portfolios before you make a choice. Good framing and impeccable focus are one thing. Style is another. When you’re making a decision, look for someone whose style suits what you envision for your wedding. Whimsical, classic or bold, a portfolio is the best indication of what to expect on your big day.

Also, keep in mind that it’s easier to boss around a hired stranger than the sweet guy who changed your diapers and fed you when your parents wanted a date night.

STAY CLASSY

Dig out pictures of your mother’s and your grandmother’s wedding dresses. Now imagine yourself swaddled in those puffy sleeves and yards of lumpy fabric. No thanks.

Styles and tastes change. While current fads seem amazing, be wary of hyper-modern trends. Find a classic, simple look and add your own twist. If you’re tempted by an aisle-long train and voluminous chicken-wire veil, maybe bring in a level-headed bridesmaid or two. The less over-the- top your dress is, the more likely it will still be in style 10 years down the road and you won’t cringe at your own wedding photos.

Do a few dance moves in the dressing room. We’re not saying you need to memorize a traditional jig before your fitting, but maybe try to drop it like it’s hot once or twice to make sure nothing slips out. If the cut of the dress doesn’t allow you to be the most confident dancer at the reception, opt for something that will keep you comfortable enough to focus on the guests who have come out to adore you rather than the dress boning that is piercing your side for nine hours.

WHO’S THAT LADY?

It’s your day, and you have professionals lined up for your hair and makeup. The inclination is to go super glam and enjoy your transformation into a supermodel, but remember who your partner fell in love with and make sure that person is the one getting married.

Unless it’s your daily style, you’ll look totally different when you opt for eyes smokier than the pits of hell or lipstick that causes solar flares. When you get those professionally taken photos back and wonder who your spouse is dancing with, you may regret your decision. Natural hues that highlight rather than disguise your charms will keep your style yours with all the glam you need.

HOW TO GREET IN ONE EASY STEP

For every person who regrets wasting their entire reception circling the room and repeating the same short “thank- you” speech, there’s another who regrets not making it around to everyone. Your guests are your staunchest supporters. They zoomed from long distances to celebrate your union and they deserve some recognition for that. But this is your day to enjoy yourself and finding that balance is so difficult.

Consider alternatives to walking around to each individual during the reception. Everyone is busy partaking in their delicious entree, and having you pop up behind them when their mouth is full is awkward for all parties. Instead, form a receiving line as people leave the ceremony and tell them how excited you are to celebrate with them at the reception. If you’d prefer to be swept off in the limo as soon as the ceremony ends, spend the cocktail hour making your rounds. For a roaring good time, take each person into a photo booth with you and your partner as they arrive at the reception. A strip of pictures with the two of you will be thanks enough.

Another option is to prepare a toast with your spouse to thank everyone for their presence. Make it heartfelt and maybe a little tear-inducing while keeping it general enough for everyone to fall under its cozy umbrella. This way everyone gets to enjoy the party without all the awkward handshakes.

DON’T WEAR THE LAMPSHADE AT YOUR OWN PARTY

You’ve been lost in a storm of planning, and the lead-up to this soirée has been only one stressful item after another on your already full plate. It’s easy to see the reception as the first time you really get to let loose and have a couple of cocktails. Go ahead. Have one. Have two. Then maybe slow down around three or four. Getting lit on your wedding day is not the ladylike or gentlemanly thing to do, and believe us, your guests will love reminding you about that time you drunkenly collapsed onto your own wedding cake.

You’ve been preparing for this night for several months (or since you saw “The Sound of Music” when you were seven and immediately began making lists and diagrams). To celebrate the success of pulling it off, you should soberly swim in the sea of “oohs” and “aahs” and look around at the amazing show you’ve created. Your most vivid memory shouldn’t be the bathroom floor.

MAKE SURE IT’S A HAPPILY EVER AFTER

In movies, the deliriously happy couple is whisked off at the end of the party to their honeymoon while their guests wave wistfully and dab at tears. In reality, the deliriously happy couple is also deliriously exhausted and burnt- out. They may not have spent much time with each other since they said their vows, and they may (if they didn’t take our earlier advice) be slightly inebriated.

Starting your honeymoon the night of or morning after your wedding may seem like a romantic whirlwind of adventure, but let us tell you what’s not romantic: airport security. You don’t want to stand in that line, get frisked and then propel 33,000 feet into the air while there’s still tequila settling in your stomach and blisters on your dance- worn feet. Besides, what’s the point of reserving an oceanside suite if you sleep through the first 48 hours of it?

Spend a day or two at home or at a nearby hotel lavishing in the love you now legally share before tackling anything strenuous like trotting the globe. Sleep off the pre-wedding anxiety, during-wedding adrenaline and after-wedding lushness. Your body and mental state will thank you for being refreshed and ready to enjoy your well-deserved time away.

HIRING A WEDDING PLANNER

A wedding is really a complicated, full-scale party that requires hundreds of decisions and dozens of external vendors working together to pull off one fabulous event. Most of us don’t have the time, energy or expertise to put together a wedding completely on our own. But don’t despair, that’s when wedding planners enter to save the day.

When you hire a wedding planner, you are hiring someone to oversee all the details of your big day so you can sit back, relax and enjoy the party. Something like the electricity hookup for the catering staff is the last thing you need to think about before walking down the aisle to marry the love of your life. Do yourself a favor and take some of the wedding stress off yourself by hiring a professional.

Besides, due to the uncertainty caused by the coronavirus public health crisis, and its resulting restrictions and safety precautions, event planning just got that much more difficult. Wedding planners have the knowledge and experience to build flexibility into contracts while pivoting and adjusting strategy with your vendors if an unforeseen circumstance impacts your big day in any way.

TIERS OF SERVICE

Wedding planners generally offer different tiers of service, priced according to the amount of time involved and services offered in each category. Before hiring a wedding planner, you and your partner should decide how much of your budget you’re willing to spend, and how much help you truly need. Once you understand the volume of work you’re able to take on and how much you need or want to outsource, you can get to work finding a wedding planner who offers the type of assistance you need.

Full-Service Wedding Planning: If you have an incredibly demanding job, chose to have your wedding in a location where you don’t live, or feel completely overwhelmed and clueless about how to start planning such a big event, then a full-service planner is probably the best choice. The investment for comprehensive wedding planning generally ranges from 10% to 20% of your total budget. In return, your planner helps you pick a wedding date, secure a venue and hone in on the specific style and vibe you want for your big day.

He or she guides you through selecting your vendors, including photographers, DJs, caterers, florists, rental companies and makeup and hair artists. With his or her knowledge and recommendations, you can save countless hours of scrolling through reviews. Furthermore, your planner attends all vendor meetings with (or for) you and handles pricing negotiations. Depending on the wedding planner you work with, you’re probably going to receive at least one wedding planning assistant in addition to your full-time event planner. Full-service wedding planning typically begins shortly after you get engaged and runs through the day of your wedding.

Partial Wedding Planning: Wedding planners may have their own term for partial wedding planning, such as month-of planning, but it generally falls between full-service planning and day-of coordination. If you already booked a venue and have a general idea for what you want your wedding to be like, partial wedding planning services are perfect for you. You get help with establishing a wedding day timeline and narrowing down your design choices, while still maintaining control of the details. You’re probably going to have one or two sit-down meetings with your planner in the days leading up to your celebration, not to mention email access to your planner throughout the process.

If you decide partial planning services are right for you, be prepared to make some big decisions (like where and when to host your wedding) on your own, but feel confident knowing you have a professional to help you with the details.

Day-of Wedding Coordination: The term “day of” is a bit misleading, as no one could come in only on your wedding day, and effectively manage all of the details and vendors. Day-of wedding coordination usually begins at least eight to 12 weeks before your big day. Your coordinator meets with you once you hire all of your outside vendors, and takes over to finalize details and confirm coverage times for the actual day. You can expect your day-of coordinator to provide a timeline of events and manage the logistics of your wedding day. They also generally attend your rehearsal and coordinate any outstanding payments or gratuities.

WEDDING PLANNER OR SUPERHERO?

Most wedding planners are expert event planners with a touch of superhero thrown in. Weddings involve a lot of people and large numbers of people generally mean a few disasters are inevitable. Most planners have already solved every kind of crisis and most usually occur without the couple even knowing what was happening. From a grandparent passing out during the toasts (they were completely fine after getting some hydration) to a melting wedding cake, wedding planners are innate problem solvers. If they have been in business for a while, chances are there are very few issues they haven’t handled.

VISION AND REALITY

You may have dreamt of your wedding day for years. Maybe you know exactly what you want the room to look like when you walk in hand in hand with your new spouse to be introduced to your guests for the first time. Or perhaps you have a Pinterest board with thousands of ideas, overflowing with inspiration. While it’s fun to imagine things in your mind or look at them on a Pinterest board, bringing that vision to life is a challenge. One of the greatest benefits of a good wedding planner is his or her ability to look at your inspiration, talk to you about your desired style and vibe, and then turn those ideas and dreams into something magical.

ADVICE AND MEDIATION

Weddings tend to cultivate unique conflicts. Bringing together two families is inherently tricky and, when you throw in all the logistical details and personal feelings involved in a wedding, the situation can get sticky. One of the best parts of having a wedding planner on board is that he or she can act as a mediator. Maybe you’re too scared to tell your future mother-in-law that you think her favorite flowers are tacky and ugly, but your wedding planner can tactfully inform her that you’re using specific floral arrangements without it feeling personal. If you have a particularly challenging bridesmaid who questions every decision, you can direct her to your wedding planner who always has your back.

Then there’s the plethora of advice you receive when you hire a planner. Not sure if a venue is big enough for your guest list? Your planner can tell you. Can’t decide if you should have live music or a DJ? Your planner can give you the pros and cons of each, and help you make a decision. Completely lost when it comes to a wedding gown? Your planner has seen every body type walk down the aisle and knows what is going to impress. Wedding planners live in the wedding world — they know what is trendy, tacky and tasteful.

WEDDING DAY DETAILS

It may seem obvious, but perhaps the biggest service a wedding planner provides is coordinating the actual wedding day. From what time your hair and makeup should be completed to sending the wedding party down the aisle, a planner has the knowledge and skills to make your day run flawlessly. Hiring a wedding planner also frees up your family members to enjoy your day instead of working to make sure everything goes to plan.

THE VALUE OF TIME

You are only engaged for a short amount of time and, as they always say, time is money. Do you want to spend that special season stressed out over 5,000 wedding decisions? Or would you rather spend your time creating memories with your partner and dreaming of your honeymoon?

A wedding planner’s most valuable contribution is time. He or she spends time finding vendors, negotiating contracts and making decisions so you don’t have to. Hiring someone who can get things done while also reducing your anxiety and workload is one of the smartest decisions you can make, besides getting married, of course!

Ways to Include Your Kids into Your Wedding

Weddings oftentimes symbolize more than just two individuals making a promise to one another. When your wedding day also represents two families being brought together, it is important to recognize and celebrate the newest additions in your life as well.
Including your children into the wedding day events not only provides them with the opportunity to feel welcomed into your life, but it also serves as your first activity together as a new family. Whether you have children of your own or you are looking to incorporate your fiancé’s children into your Big Day, there are multiple ways to create lasting memories for all involved.

During the Ceremony

There are a handful of roles that you can assign to children during the wedding ceremony that will not require too much coordination from them or add a ton of preparation to your ceremony planning (because let’s be honest, who needs that?). The following ideas are simple, yet put a modern twist on the treasured traditions you will probably already be including.

Let Them Lead the Way. One of the most magnificent parts of the ceremony is when the wedding party makes their grand entrance. While your friends, relatives, and beloved eagerly await your presence, the kids can kick off the processional. Consider giving them a sign
to hold adorned with a phrase such as “Here Comes the Bride.” Having your child lead the processional gives them the opportunity to literally lead you to the next step of both of your lives.

Give Them Flower Duty or Make Them the Ring Bearer. The role of flower girl has long been relegated to cute younger relatives and charming children of close friends. However, if you have a daughter that is younger than nine, it’s a no-brainer to let her be the one to scatter flower petals down the aisle. While it’s best to have a flower girl at least three years of age, if your daughter is a little bit younger, consider assigning a relative or family friend to help her get down the aisle without a hitch. If you have a son, making him the ring bearer is one of the easiest ways to include him in your special day. Your son will feel like an important part of your union when he carries in the rings, and those pictures will be absolutely adorable. Make sure your son is old enough to hold the rings and complete the walk down the aisle without getting distracted or shy.

Have Them “Give You Away.” Traditionally, the father of the bride gives her away to the groom during the wedding ceremony. However, you can certainly have your child give you away too! However, aisles can quickly become crowded so try to stick to one or two people besides yourself to escort you down the aisle for a smooth entrance.

Include Them in Your Wedding Party. Some couples make their longtime friends or siblings their bridesmaids or groomsmen,
but there’s no rule saying you can’t make your mini-me your right-hand pal. Let your child stand first in line by your side as you promise forever to the love of your life.

Have Them be a Part of Your Unity Ceremony. There are many different types of unity ceremonies that have become popular over the years, but no matter which one you choose they are all very easy to adapt to have your children involved. The candle unity ceremony can be customized by having your children light the two candles that you will use as a couple to light the main unity candle, as is normally done by the parents of the couple. This is great for couples who have separate children of their own, as it gives them a way to
show the joining of the two families. If you choose to go the sand route, it is as easy as picking a different color for each child and having them integrate their color within yours.

Add Them to Your Vows. There are a couple of ways that you can include your children in your wedding vows. If your child is an infant or toddler, writing the child into your vows is an option. After all, you are promising forever not just to your partner, but to your children as well. If your child is an adolescent, you and your partner can have them stand at the altar as you recite vows directly to them. Teenage or adult children can create their own vows to your partner to recite along with you and your groom.

Giving Them a Gift of Commitment. As you are giving your fiancé a ring to show your commitment, you can also choose to give a gift to your children as well. This is generally done before or after the exchanging of the rings. It can be as simple as a rose, a special book with meaning, or perhaps jewelry. A bracelet is a great choice as it also is circle shaped and can be a sign of unity for your family. There are different ways that you can present the gift of commitment as well. Your officiant can explain the gift of commitment or talk about the meaning behind the gift itself. Or this can be the perfect time for you to say personal vows to your children expressing your commitment.

During the Reception

If you and your fiancé would rather give your child a role in your wedding that is a little more creative and out-of-the-box, the wedding reception is the best place to do it. Not only does this allow for creative incorporations that your guests can participate in, but it also allows your child to think up their own way to be a part of your wedding.

Let Them Throw the Bouquet, Too.
After the cake has been cut, many brides opt to toss their bouquet. However, there is a darling way to add your child to this age-old tradition as well. While your single friends and family are clamoring to catch your bouquet, you can have your little one toss a small matching bouquet of their own into the crowd. This can be especially fun if they are between the ages of three and nine as they are likely to be excited to be included in the action. Some florists and specialty shops also make edible candy bouquets, which can add an element of fun for a younger “tosser.”

Include Them in the First Dance. During the first dance, all eyes are typically on the couple as they sway their way into the night. However, this is a moment where three or more is not a crowd. You can make your first dance extra special by including your child in a variety of ways. All three of you can huddle or dance in a circle holding hands. If you have two or more children, consider devoting time to choreograph a fun dance number for all of you to perform in lieu of the first dance. If your child is shy or doesn’t dance, you can include them in the brainstorming process as you and your partner choose the song you both will dance to. You can even have your DJ shout out their involvement in picking the song.

Create a Signature Drink for Them. If you are already creating a unique cocktail for your guests at your wedding, consider
having an additional non-alcoholic signature drink in honor of your child or children. Name it after them or include them in the process of naming it and pass them around with your appetizers. Your child will feel like a rock star having their very own special drink that they can partake in during toasts and any guests who don’t drink alcohol will appreciate having a signature drink with so much meaning behind it.

Give them a Spotlight Moment. There will be plenty of times throughout the night where the focus will be solely on you and your new spouse. However, you can add a specific and special moment during the reception in which your child can share something that is unique to them. This can be anything from a poem, playing an instrument, or kicking off the toasts. There is no limit as to what your child can do. You can also take this a step further by having them prepare for their spotlight moment with a relative or family friend to make the moment a sweet surprise for the day of the wedding.

Overall, there are many ways to incorporate your children or your fiancé’s children into your wedding celebration. You can try one of these suggestions or even find your own special way to include your child in the festivities. We have only one requirement – have your photographer on call and ready so that you can cherish these moments for years to come.

Written by Nesa Mangal

Of course you’re a gracious, caring, loving person. But let’s face it, you’re engaged. Everyone feels stressed, overextended, and generally fed up at times when planning a wedding. But beware – that can make you susceptible to turning into “That Bride,” also not-so-affectionately referred to as a “Bridezilla.”

No one wants to be “That Bride.” But how do you know if you’re venturing into that territory? If any of these sound like you, it may be time to put down this wedding magazine, take a step away from the sample invites, and take a break.

You talk endlessly about the wedding.

You’re excited. And everyone’s excited for you. Your wedding is a big, momentous occasion and people are happy to celebrate with you. However, that doesn’t mean they need to hear about it every second of every day. Please don’t bombard family, friends, and co-workers with photos of flowers, wedding favors, or potential bridesmaid dresses. When they ask how the wedding planning is going, try to avoid launching into a 30-minute spiel on how you can’t choose between the crab puffs or the stuffed mushrooms.

It may seem beneficial to get things off your chest, but it may actually stress you out more. Instead, enjoy spending time with your loved ones. See how they’re doing, catch up on what’s going on in their lives, and take a (well-deserved) break from the wedding madness.

You treat your bridesmaids like actual maids.

Your friends love you and they’re most likely honored to be part of your special day. To be honest, most of them would do almost anything for you, but please don’t ask them to. Don’t ask them to blow their entire savings account on a dress they’ll never wear again. Don’t demand that they come to appointments at the last minute. Don’t force them to spend their precious weekends DIYing your centerpieces, invites, and favors.

Your license to get married is not a license to boss your friends around. Understand they have bills to pay, jobs to go to, and other loved ones that need their time and attention. If you love an expensive bridesmaid dress, offer to pay for it or split the cost. Plan ahead for any outings you’d like your girls to attend. Ask them politely to help you with your wedding DIY projects at a time that’s convenient. They’re your bridesmaids and they want to be part of your wedding, but they also want to be treated with respect and kindness.

You dismiss your family.

You’re getting input from everyone. Mom thinks you should have more flowers. Grandma has a gorgeous venue in mind. Your sister wants short bridesmaid dresses. It can be overwhelming when everyone is throwing ideas your way. I mean it’s your Big Day right? Shouldn’t you get what you want? Of course, but before you start screaming “my day, my way,” try to see where your family is coming from. They’re excited, too, and they really do have good intentions. Listen to their ideas and appreciate that they care.

You certainly don’t have to do anything you don’t want to, but by listening you’ll make them feel loved and appreciated. Who knows, they may actually have some great ideas!

You blow your budget.

You’re wedding dress shopping and you know that dress is over your budget, but you try it on anyways, and you fall in love. A week later you’re picking out flowers. You’d planned on getting a simple bouquet of roses, but there are so many other options. The next thing you know you’re picking out spring peonies for a fall wedding.

We’re not saying you should skimp on your Big Day here – you only get one wedding, so you want to make it absolutely perfect. That’s totally understandable. But there’s a reason you created a budget. Nothing causes stress and anxiety quite like debt. Create a list of wedding must-haves and a list of wedding would-likes. Start with the must-have list, and allocate what’s left to the would-likes. If you just must have a gown that’s over your allotted dress budget, see if you can borrow the difference from another area to allow the cost to even out.

You don’t apologize.

It’s a week before your wedding and you’re meeting up with your sister for brunch. She walks in with an awful new haircut. As hard as you try, you just can’t keep quiet. Your brunch date ends with you yelling at her about how she’s going to ruin your wedding photos and how you can’t believe she’s being so inconsiderate.

No matter how hard you try not to be “That Bride,” you may slip up. That’s okay. No one’s perfect and your loved ones know that. It’s embarrassing if you do go off the deep end, but the best way to do damage control is just to fess up. You don’t want any hard feelings on your Big Day, so take the initiative to make things right.

You try something new at the last minute.

Your wedding photo will likely be on display for years to come, so it’s only natural that you want to look your best. Maybe you’re looking to slim down. Maybe you’d like to clear up your complexion. Whatever your reasons, don’t be too extreme. Talk to your doctor before you try a new diet or workout routine to make sure it’s right for you. You may be in great shape for the wedding, but if you’re too exhausted to dance, what’s the point?

Same goes with hair and makeup. Give any new skin care products, hair colors, or makeup styles a test run well in advance of your Big Day. If you’re planning on getting a trim or a touch-up color, make sure you do it a few days before the wedding, just in case. You’ll have enough to think about as your Big Day approaches, your looks don’t need to be one of them.

You forget the point of the day.

Dress? Check. Flowers? Check. Food? Check. Venue? Check. Photographer? Check. Looks like you’ve got everything, right? Wrong. You’re missing the most important part of the day – your fiancé! It’s easy to get caught up in the wedding planning process. It can seem like there’s so much to do and so little time to do it.

The easiest way to avoid becoming “That Bride” is to remember what your wedding is all about. It’s about you and your fiancé spending the rest of your lives together.  When you think about that, the details don’t seem to matter as much. At the end of the day, you get to marry the love of your life. That’s what really matters.

Keep Your Celebration on Schedule

Your Wedding Reception is a well-timed event. From the cocktail hour to dinner and dancing to cutting the cake, everything runs on a precise schedule, which means you need to know what to do and when to do it. ChicagoStyle Weddings breaks down the reception basics and helps you plan your party hour by hour.

Get help.

When it comes to planning your reception, don’t try to do it alone. Work with a wedding planner or your venue’s coordinator who can help you organize the ins and outs of your reception. These wedding professionals arrange events all the time so you can trust they know the particulars of party planning. They can help you stay on schedule and make sure you don’t underestimate the time needed to tackle reception events like the first dance.

Get started early.

Venue setup takes time and should be done well before the party starts. Your reception flowers and centerpieces should be in place at least an hour before the reception starts; the same goes for your wedding cake. Decorative elements like candles, chair covers and linens should be ready to go a day before the wedding. Banquet staff can arrange these elements for you. Then you and your planner can review the look and make any necessary changes the day of your wedding – or even after the rehearsal dinner if everything is in place. If you leave these details to the last minute, you’ll feel hurried and frustrated, especially if something doesn’t go as planned.

Review your vendor contracts.

Part of making sure your day goes as smoothly as possible is ensuring your vendors know what’s expected of them and when. If you want your DJ to be set up 30 minutes or more before the party starts, make sure that time clause is in the contract – if it’s not, you don’t have control over your time frame. Your planner can help you set reasonable expectations for each vendor, and she can make sure the vendors know what time table they’re working with for the day of coordination.

Have a reception game plan.

As with any event, you need to develop and write out a party plan. Make sure each person assigned to a job – from the bartender to wait staff to band leader –knows what’s expected of him or her. Write out the plan, review it with your vendors to foresee problems and then test the plan with a dry run a week before or more. Part of this plan involves having a backup in case something doesn’t go as expected. Meet with your planner a few weeks prior to your Big Day so you can map out the day hour-by-hour, area-by-area. You’ll want to figure out where you and your groom need to be at all times, plus you’ll review reception details like when dinner will be served and small nuances like which tables will get served first. If it helps you and the guests in your wedding party, type up an itinerary so everyone knows what to expect.

Don’t Rush.

There’s a lot of fun to squeeze into a few hours, but that’s no reason to rush through your wedding reception. No one will have a good time if the event is too structured and everyone feels pressured to stay on schedule. Build some flexibility into your reception so you can let the good times happen naturally without feeling the pressure to finish by a certain time. For example, if your first dance receives an encore, then go with the flow. Don’t worry that an extra dance will make you stray from the schedule. These little moments are the memorable ones, so embrace them.

Don’t overlook the details.

Make a list of all the important details that are essential to your reception’s success. Budget enough time for each key item so your schedule doesn’t get backed up or out of sync. The toasting, for example, should happen after the announcement of the bride and groom. Make sure waiters have enough time to serve guests champagne or cider so they’re ready to toast your nuptials.

Plan for the unexpected.

Nothing is perfect so have wiggle room planned for your party. Maybe your menu will get a last-minute change or your DJ won’t have all your guests’ requests, but both are okay. If you can relax a little, you’ll see that every event has a few wrinkles that aren’t make-or-break moments. So take a deep breath and enjoy the what-ifs as much as possible. Your wedding reception is a once-in-a-lifetime kind of event. You get to plan all the details, like the menu, the music playlist and the décor. You want to experience every moment to the fullest, so do your best to devise a plan and a timeline that you can follow and not fret about when the day comes.

The hour-by-hour breakdown.

While you and your guests may want to boogie until the wee hours of the night, it’s not likely that your venue and caterer’s staff feels the same. A typical wedding reception runs approximately five hours long, and has a fairly structured schedule. Your band leader or DJ will serve as the Master of Ceremonies, or the MC, for the evening. He or she will keep your party moving along smoothly so no one feels rushed and you don’t run into overtime fees.

Whether you’re looking at a mid-morning reception or an evening affair, here’s a general overview of how it can progress.

Hour one:

Cocktail Hour

You said “I do,” kissed, and now it’s time for the guests to make their way to the reception. There may be some downtime between, but guests will generally arrive to a cocktail hour pretty quickly after the service. If the ceremony is held at the same venue as the reception, guests may simply venture to another part of the space to continue the festivities.

While the new couple, their attendants, and their families are out taking glamour shots around the city, it’s up to the MC to keep guests entertained. Light music in the background allows for socializing without that awkward silence. The MC can also advise guests to begin taking their seats about ten or fifteen minutes before the couple is scheduled to make their grand entrance.

Hour two:

The Newlyweds Arrive

After the MC has guided guests to their seats, the band or DJ will change up the music to indicate that something big is about to happen. The MC will take the mic and start introducing the family and wedding party as they enter one-by-one, two-by-two, or whatever-by-whatever. The newlyweds will be announced last –to wild cheers from the crowd, of course. After this, the MC will request that guests take their seats.

This is a great opportunity to move right into your first dance. You’ve got the spotlight, might as well use it! When the dance is over, the band or DJ will switch back to some pleasant background music to encourage chatter through dinner. Here’s your chance to start greeting your guests at each table.

A few minutes later, dinner will be served. At this point, take a break and grab a bite. You’ve been planning this meal for months! You deserve a few minutes to try it. Let the wedding party and family eat first – especially those who are making speeches. Toasts usually begin about 20 minutes after dinner has been served.

Traditionally toasts are started by the best man, followed by the maid of honor, and then the parents’ speeches. If you and your new spouse would like to say a few words, this is a great time for that as well. Be sure to give your MC a list of everyone’s name so they can announce each person who will be speaking and their relation to the couple. Bonus tip –spelling the names out phonetically will drastically reduce the number of awkward pronunciations.

Hour three:

Dance, Dance

After the speeches wrap up, it’s time to hit the dance floor. If you decided not to do your first dance right after your grand entrance, now would be the time to do it. Traditionally, the father-daughter dance follows, and then the mother-son dance. After that, your MC will invite guests to join the wedding party on the dance floor, and everybody starts going crazy.

Hour four:

Traditions

As the dancing continues, it’s time for all the single ladies to put their hands up and catch the bouquet. It’s also garter time for the guys. Your MC will keep track of time and help spread out any of the fun extras, like the Hora at a Jewish wedding, an anniversary dance, or a money dance.

About halfway through the hour, you get to smash frosting into your new spouse’s face – oops, we meant cut the cake. Your MC will help to clear the floor a bit so that everyone has a great view. Then it’s right back to dancing. Because let’s be real –that’s what everyone wants to do!

Hour five:

Take A Bow

While you and your crew are out on the dance floor getting your groove on, Grandma is probably starting to fall asleep at her table. Guests will start to trickle out during hour five, and it’s time to start wrapping up the evening.

Have your MC announce last call at the bar about 30 to 45 minutes before the reception officially ends. A great way to start getting everyone out the door is to have the wedding party coordinate a fond farewell for the newlyweds outside the venue, complete with bubbles or sparklers. If you plan to do this, have your MC give the crowd a fifteen-minute warning before it begins.

If you’ve got a particularly rowdy crowd that doesn’t seem to be taking the hint, ask your band or DJ to play a very definitive last song. It’s pretty hard to misinterpret the meaning of “Closing Time” by Semisonic. After that, bring up the lights, shut off the music, and eventually people will head out.

Other things to consider.

As you’re planning your reception timeline, remember that it’s always best to overestimate the amount of time needed. Allow enough time between scheduled activities for the unexpected, and don’t forget that you and your spouse need time to relax and enjoy your family and guests!

Check to see if your venue contract requires all guests and vendors to vacate the premises by a certain time. Remember that once your guests leave, your vendors will still need time to clean up and clear out any equipment. Those speakers don’t pack themselves. Make sure to give them at least an hour to ensure you don’t exceed your venue rental period. Overtime fees can get expensive quickly.

From blue skies and gentle breezes to longer days and busy nights, it’s no wonder that spring and summer are the popular times of year to get married. Outdoor weddings are becoming increasingly popular, but not without additional precautions. Here are some tips for ensuring your outdoor soirée goes off without a hitch.

Have a plan B (and even a plan C).

You can plan for many aspects of your wedding, but unfortunately, the weather is not one of them. During the planning process, work with your event coordinator to devise backup plans in case of inclement weather. This helps alleviate extra stress on the Big Day because you’ll already have plans to shift to if needed. The best thing about backup plans is that they’re not one-size-fits-all. You can take elements from one plan and incorporate them into another on the fly to craft a backup plan that’s perfect for your situation.

Common backup plans include having a tent on the grounds (look into ordering side panels, to block wind and rain), having an indoor option on standby, stalling start times if the weather is expected to clear, and having outdoor heaters in case of an unexpected cold front. Backup plans are one of those things you cross your fingers and hope you won’t need, but you will be thankful you have one prepared. After all, rain on your wedding day is supposedly good luck, so you might as well be ready to tackle it head-on.

Offer a seasonal menu.

Of the few details guests remember from a wedding, food is almost always one of them. Heat can do awful things to some menu items and can even make guests sick, so it’s critically important that your selections are made to withstand the hot summer sun. If your cocktail hour is taking place in the afternoon beneath the sun, stick to seasonal veggies, fruit skewers, and other light appetizers instead of heavy or dairy-based items that might melt or change in texture due to heat. Make sure all seafood, dairy, and meat are stored in cooled serving dishes or on ice.

For dinner, consider comfort foods like pulled pork barbecue with a citrus salad or a pig roast with corn on the cob. These dishes are not only delicious but bring instant nostalgia to the dog days of summer. Talk to your caterer about timing and cooling of food in order to keep it appetizing and, most importantly, safe!

Pro tip: No matter how beautiful your cake, keep it somewhere cool before and after you cut it – you don’t want it to melt or collapse on the floor from too much sun exposure.

Prepare for the elements

As lovely as summer can be, it can also be pretty high maintenance in terms of staying comfortable. Anticipate your guests’ needs by making sure the ceremony and reception sites are equipped to combat the potentially warm weather. If you’re having ceremony programs, brainstorm ways to double them as fans or distribute mini battery-operated fans so guests can cool off if it’s hot. To keep guests hydrated at the ceremony, have bottled water in themed ice buckets or a lemonade stand close by. Once the reception starts, move the hydration station near the dance floor – you and your guests will definitely need it later!

If you haven’t already booked your wedding site, research venues that offer both indoor and outdoor party areas, so guests can decide if they would be more comfortable indoors. If you’ve already secured your space, talk to your event coordinator about how to use natural shade and other cool-off options. Guests might also appreciate having sunscreen, lotion, bug spray, and other seasonal remedies on hand. Place these items in decorative containers at the wedding site or put them in a bathroom basket so guests can grab for on-the-go relief.

Play off your setting.

While indoor-only venues may have their own rules, the décor options for outdoor weddings are practically limitless. Take advantage of the abundant space by using scenery and natural landscapes to your decorating advantage. Some ideas include creating signage for menu items and directions to drinking, dinner, and dancing locations. You can also use battery-operated lights to string in tree branches or line the top of a tent to help create a romantic, ambient atmosphere. Strung lights will look especially pretty once the sun sets, too.

Outdoor weddings not only create a memorable setting, they also make it easy to entertain. Consider personalizing bean bag sets with your names and wedding date or providing Bocce ball, horseshoes, and other casual lawn games for the adults. Bubbles and kites are great for the kiddos in attendance. Once the sun sets, you can host a bonfire with a late night s’mores or hot dog bar. When the night ends, have a sparkler sendoff, where guests light up the path from your reception to your getaway car or release paper lanterns into the sky, a long time Asian tradition that symbolizes good wishes.

Dress for success.

Ensure comfort and confidence on your Big Day by making sure your look is summer ready. Whether it’s a dress or menswear, stick to lighter, breathable fabrics that will keep everyone cool. Work with your dress consultant to find a gown made of flowing fabrics, such as chiffon or crepe. If your heart is set on a gown made of heavier fabric such as satin, consider changing into something more lightweight when it’s time to dance. Guarantee all-day comfort from head to toe by wearing block heels, flats, or other shoes that won’t stick in the soft summer grass.

Keep your hair and makeup on point from morning to night by choosing styles that work with warm weather, not against it. Curls, waves, and sculpted up-dos often don’t do well in humidity. To fight frizz, ask your stylist to experiment with sleeker styles at your hair trials, such as a pulled back bun or ponytail. For a boho vibe, try a chunky braid to keep your hair away from your face and off your neck. While it’s important that you look and feel your best, keep in mind that the more makeup you wear, the greater chance it might run by the end of the night, so play around with palettes that won’t require a lot of layers.

Pro tip: Have your maid of honor pack travel hair spray, blotting papers, and a compact in her survival kit in case of a beauty emergency.

Have a smart timeline.

Guests don’t want to stand around in the sweltering sun while you’re off taking photos, so be mindful of when the sun might be at its strongest and coolest when planning your timeline. Not sure where to start? Research when the sun is expected to set in your wedding month and year, then build your timeline around that window. This will help keep guests comfortable and you will also guarantee ideal natural light for photos. For reference, the hottest part of the day is usually between 1-3 in the afternoon, give or take.

If temperatures are expected to be hot all around, consider shortening the time between your ceremony and reception and talk to your event coordinator to devise a plan to keep your guests cool and comfortable. Also, take into consideration the direction guests will be facing for the ceremony. Those having daytime nuptials should try to orient the ceremony so the sun will be on the guests’ backs and not in their eyes. Guests will appreciate not having to squint to see your vows and that you spared them a potentially painful sunburn.

Whether your wedding takes place in a garden or backyard or on a mountain or beach, there’s something truly special about an outdoor wedding. While they come with more dos and don’ts than traditional weddings, outdoor weddings tend to offer more possibilities for innovation. Acing an outdoor wedding is easy with a little extra planning and organization. Follow these tips and your biggest wedding day worry will be making sure your champagne flute is always full.

Written by Heather Hagy

One of the most beautiful ways for a duo to reaffirm their love for each other is through the renewal of their wedding vows. While wedding ceremonies come with quite a few must-dos, fortunately, most of the details of planning a vow renewal can be as simple or as extravagant as the couple desires. If you’re ready to relive or upgrade one of the most special moments of your life and are not sure where to begin, look no further. Here are six answers to the most frequently asked questions about vow renewals.

Why should I renew?

There is absolutely no wrong reason to renew your wedding vows. Many couples will consider a vow renewal to commemorate a milestone wedding anniversary, such as their five, 10 or 15-year anniversary. Some couples may opt to renew their vows after overcoming big life obstacles or rough patches in their relationship. Others might finally have the means to have the dream wedding they wish they could’ve had the first time around. Realistically, anything goes when it comes to you and your spouse re-embracing your commitment, so go with your heart and renew for whichever reason feels right to you both.

When do I renew?

A couple can renew their vows any time after their first marriage ceremony. Since a renewal ceremony is not legally binding, there are no real restrictions on timing. This ultimately allows you and your sweetheart to renew your vows as soon as the next day or even 60 years down the road. Typically, the reason you choose to renew your vows will also indicate the date you’ll choose to renew them. Be sure to set aside enough time to execute the type of ceremony you are planning to have. If you are looking to have a larger affair, you still want to follow the same preparation time frame for a wedding, which is 12 to 15 months. On the other hand, if you are having a casual spontaneous getaway for just the two of you, you may only need a few weeks or even a few days to prepare and plan.

Where do I renew?

The simple catch-all answer to this question is – anywhere that you would like. If you were not able to go big the first time around, renewing your vows could be the perfect time to bring out the fanfare if your budget now allows. Choose a venue the same way you would during traditional wedding planning by booking it at least eight months to a year out. On the other hand, if you felt obligated to have a larger ceremony on your Big Day, now is the time to make it an intimate occasion out of town, or at a small or casual location.

Who has to officiate?

Because the vow renewal ceremony has no legal roots, virtually anyone you would like can officiate it and they don’t need to be ordained. This is unlike a wedding ceremony, where certified religious clergy or civil officiants have to perform this role. If you want to throw a tender nod to your first wedding, you can ask the person who officiated it the first time around to officiate your vow renewal as well. If you are looking for a less traditional spin, consider having a close friend, relative, or even your children officiate. If you prefer something more personal or you are renewing your vows with your partner alone, you can share the responsibility.

Who do I invite?

The truth is you do not have to invite that many people, or you can invite everyone. Wedding renewals give you free reign with how you invite your guests to your event. Unlike your original wedding ceremony, where mailing invitations was the best practice, your vow renewal offers more flexibility. You can choose to invite your guests by phone, via email, or even text.

If, however, your vow renewals are going to be as grand, if not grander, than your original wedding, then plan on sending out physical invitations. Make it clear that you are inviting guests to a vow renewal ceremony, but the rest of the information, such as location, date, and RSVP will remain the same. Determine who should be a must on your invite list based on your reason for renewing your vows. Don’t be afraid to trim the guest list from your wedding ceremony and invite only your closest friends and family.

What kind of vows do you exchange?

When it comes time to renew your vows, you have a few options as to how you can go about it. Some couples pay homage to a sweet memory by exchanging the vows that they said when they were first married. Another option is for couples to completely rewrite their original vows. This is the perfect opportunity for you and your spouse to spend time reflecting and verbalizing how you feel about your relationship after a few years. Or, you can skip both of those options and stick to the traditional script. Usually, rings are exchanged after the vows are completed. Before the vow renewal ceremony, you and your partner can decide if you want to re-exchange your rings or switch them out for new ones. Couples might even consider engraving the bands of their wedding rings with a heartfelt phrase or the date of their vow renewal. If a couple is interested in exchanging new rings, however, this is the perfect opportunity to upgrade or get in on the trend of stackable wedding bands.

Overall, out of the many events tied to the bond of marriage, renewing your vows has the least amount of structure and legal necessities. For couples looking to recreate the magic of their wedding, their renewals might resemble the traditional wedding ceremony. However, if your vow renewal is part of a casual or more creative plan to renew your vows, the couple can look forward to putting as little or as much thought and preparation as they would like. This flexibility makes for a truly customizable occasion, whether you are looking for something small or large. No matter how you look at renewing your wedding vows, the act is both a sweet nod to the love you and your partner have shared over time and a chance to truly celebrate that love in whatever fashion you wish.

Written by Nesa Mangal

Planning and Prepping for your Cultural Fusion Wedding

Along with being a day to declare your love and commitment to your significant other, your wedding can be an opportunity to pay homage to your cultural heritage. Most cultures have customary wedding traditions that brides and grooms might be expected to follow. But if you and your partner come from different cultural or religious backgrounds, going the traditional route may not be an option. Instead, you might be wondering how best to incorporate elements that not only honor all the diverse customs from both your backgrounds, but also appease your families.

Communication is Key.

Before you dive into the details of your wedding planning process, it’s important to communicate with your partner from the very start. Have an open conversation with your fiancé about which of your traditions are must-haves. If one of you is Jewish, will you exchange vows under a chuppah or sign a ketubah? If either of you is Greek, will the money dance be part of your reception?

Being upfront with each other will give you a much better idea of how to organize the events of your wedding. Your decisions should reflect what works best for both of you, without sacrificing important parts of your identity. At the same time, keep an open mind and be prepared to compromise. You don’t want to upstage the needs of your fiancé.

Keep your families in the loop.

While decisions you make for your wedding are completely up to you and your fiancé, it’s a good idea to keep an open line of communication with both of your families. Not only will this prevent any unexpected surprises on the day of, but your family might make great consultants. Parents and grandparents can often offer their wisdom if you are unsure about any of your cultures’ wedding day rituals. Along with being a great resource, your family will surely appreciate you going the extra mile to include them in the planning.

It’s also encouraged to take time to educate both your families on each other’s traditions. They will undoubtedly be curious and explaining your reasons behind certain choices might help to ease any concerns they might have. If there’s cultural etiquette that may not translate, be honest with them about it. This is the best way to avoid any accidental faux pas on your wedding day.

Create an informational program.

Many weddings offer guests an itinerary prior to the ceremony. If you choose to make one, it might be helpful to write brief summaries of traditions your guests might not be familiar with. If you don’t want to add another stationery piece to your list, then you might have your officiant explain the rituals before conducting them. Not only will this prevent confusion for your guests, but it will also help them understand the significance of what you’re doing.

Set the scene with an appropriate venue.

Choosing a venue to host your ceremony might be the trickiest decision yet, especially if you and your soon-to-be spouse come from two different religious backgrounds. It’s very common for couples to get married in places of worship, but a ceremony at a Catholic cathedral if you or your fiancé is Muslim may not be the greatest fit. Unless you and your spouse decide otherwise, a traditional wedding ceremony venue might not be wanted by either of you. If you do decide to have your wedding in a religious institution, you will want to research your venue to make sure they will honor interfaith ceremonies.

In the end, you may choose to avoid religious institutions altogether by exchanging vows in a neutral location. If you plan on getting married during the warmer months, for example, a gorgeous outdoor ceremony on the beach could be a great solution. Likewise, during chillier times of the year, you might decide to host both your ceremony and reception in an indoor garden.

Find a flexible officiant.

Crafting a multi-cultural ceremony where each family’s traditions and customs are represented is undeniably challenging, so choosing the right officiant is crucial. Pick an officiant experienced with seamlessly blending elements of different religions and cultures. Finding the right officiant might take a bit of research. Don’t stop looking until you find the perfect fit–someone willing to give you the ceremony experience you desire.

You might also decide to take it a step further by hiring two officiants to represent both backgrounds. This is an excellent compromise that equally respects and includes your two cultures.

Save the (right) date.

In some cultures, there may be certain dates you will want to avoid for your wedding. For example, according to Chinese tradition, certain dates are considered more favorable for marriage, while others could signify bad luck. Also, be mindful of any notable cultural events. You wouldn’t want to risk offending your guests by making them choose between your wedding or a beloved holiday. Consult your families to find out if there are any dates you should avoid if you want to observe these aspects of your collective cultures.

Choosing your attire.

Wedding attire varies widely across different cultures. Colorful lehengas or saris in rich tones of red and gold are standard garb for brides of Indian cultures, while white Kimonos are customary for the traditional Japanese bride. But you don’t have to fully commit to one look for your cultural fusion wedding. If you have South Asian Roots but want to incorporate a more westernized style, wear a sweeping white gown, but then also incorporate the Mehendi ceremony of intricately applying henna to your hands. You can experiment with different combinations of attire to find what works best for you.

Craft the perfect fusion menu.

As the tastiest part of the day, you will want to create a menu that your guests can thoroughly enjoy. Some cultures and religions abide by certain dietary restrictions, so take extra care when choosing which foods will be served. While it’s impossible to please everyone, variety should be a priority to avoid offending guests who are unable to eat certain items. If you go for a buffet-style instead of a plated dinner, it’s polite to properly label all the dishes to make it easier for guests to navigate your wedding meal. Cocktail hour is another great opportunity to pay homage to traditional cultural cuisine by offering a nice sampling of different hors’ d’oeuvres. Maybe including flaky Spanakopita or melt-in-your-mouth Tirokroketes as a nod to Grecian roots. Likewise, if you decide to have a wedding cake you might also consider having a dessert table filled with sweet delicacies from both your cultures.

Entertain your guests.

In some cultures, weddings are bold, lively parties filled with dancing and jubilation; while in other cultures they are more solemn, ritualistic affairs. Consider the diversity of your guest list and tailor your entertainment to what you think will appeal to the majority. A DJ can play a mixture of traditional music along with more popular songs. Or, you might choose to stick to a playlist of your choosing altogether.

If you plan on performing any traditional dances, make sure to inform your wedding coordinator and DJ well in advance to handle any prior preparations. Similar to the ceremony, alert your guests so that they understand what you’re doing. If the dances are simple enough, you might offer the opportunity for guests to learn the steps so that they can join in on the fun!

Planning a cultural fusion wedding is challenging, but it doesn’t have to be overwhelming. While you may feel pressured by your family to follow certain traditions and rituals, remember at the end of the day you get the final say in what you do. When all is said and done, your wedding will mean more than just uniting your families. It will be the marriage of all the beautifully complex customs and practices that make up your unique backgrounds.

Written by Micaela Fischer

Determining the Right Kind of Setting for Your Big Day

You are envisioning your wedding as a fairy tale. You and your future spouse are the main characters, but every story must begin with a setting.

Choosing your venue may be the most overwhelming step for you. It sets the tone for the entire wedding. Whether you opt for the convenience of a hotel or the rustic landscape at the edge of a forest, each choice has its ups and downs.

Figuring out where to start is the hard part. Before deciding on your venue, allow yourself several visits to a handful of places in order to figure out what your style truly is. Knowing what type of venue will enhance your vision is half the battle. Once you decide that, you can work with a wedding planner or do a search online to find several options.

Hotel Amenities

When you book a wedding at a hotel, you know you will be taken care of. A hotel is a one-stop wedding shop with facilities for the ceremony, cocktail hour, reception, a luxurious night’s sleep, and an optional morning brunch.

Some hotels keep everything such as food and beverage in-house. They handle the set-up, servers, take-down, and even have their own executive chef. Think of these locations as a one-stop shop. Check with hotels to see what they offer in the way of customization. Many changes can be made to the room in order to suit your individual style such as uplighting, changing the color and material of chairs that are used, and the linens that are chosen.

The biggest draw of a hotel wedding is that you know your guests will be safe. When you’re at a hotel, the only keys your guests have to touch are the ones that let them into their rooms. It’s also convenient if you have guests traveling to attend your nuptials. “Guests can come from out of town and go right to their guest rooms,” says Larmon. This means you have them corralled the next morning if you want to host a brunch, letting you spend more time with the loved ones you don’t get to see all the time.

Lofty Expectations

Offer your guests a unique experience with loft event spaces in the city. Each offers a different vibe, and they’re usually open to letting you customize the look. Details from the furniture that is selected to the layout of the room can be customized to encompass each couple’s unique vision. No two events will ever be the same.

Many couples gravitate toward loft spaces because of the modern, airy, open feel. Exposed white-washed brick or large columns can really emphasize the enormity of the space. This chic, modern style has become extremely popular and will definitely continue to grow. Minimalistic décor on the walls can really emphasize the unique look while sheer draping and natural light creates a clean and bright aesthetic.

One thing to note as you are imagining all the amazing furniture and décor you can arrange in such an open space, many lofts require you to bring in almost everything. Dealing with all those separate vendors on your own can be difficult. Definitely lean on your venue’s event coordinator. Event spaces know what they’re doing, and with their resources at your disposal, you know you are choosing from a list of quality caterers and vendors who deliver on their promises, taking the guesswork out of it.

Conference Center Simplicity

Conference centers are also set up to serve. With staff well-versed in the many intricacies of large-scale events, you can often find plenty of amenities in one convenient location with the accommodations you’re looking for.

With its contemporary feel and sleek styling, a conference center wedding attracts modern couples. Conference centers provide couples with a larger guest list the ability to have everyone they love in one room while still allowing ample space to customize their Big Day. These spaces are often a clean slate and open to providing couples with the ability to tailor to space to fit their vision. Conference centers also have strong ties with local vendors. Be sure to ask who they recommend.

Par for the Golf Course

If you are envisioning a picturesque landscape as the backdrop for your vows, book a golf course for your wedding. Golf courses provide guests with abundant photo opportunities that utilize their natural surroundings.

Many golf courses feature outdoor spaces for the ceremony with an indoor ballroom for the reception. Most golf courses will do their best to make sure their ballroom has a stunning view of the green. Sprawling lawn, beautiful trees, no ugly buildings or streets in the way? Yes, please. Golf courses get a bad rap for not being able to create a unique look for each couple, but it’s simply not true. When it comes to personalization, they want to help you create your vision.

Another perk for some of your guests? Most courses will offer golf outing packages to wedding parties for both pre and post-wedding events.

Mansion Glamour

Go for bold opulence with a wedding at a mansion. Perfect for vintage lovers and architecture nerds, a mansion wedding offers a rich aesthetic before you even lift a finger.

Not only can the guests explore at their leisure, but you can also pick different and interesting ways to utilize all of the available spaces. Couples can exchange vows in unique spots around the mansion such as under a pergola in the gardens or, if available, in a historic church or courtyard. With a combination of indoor and outdoor space, you can truly customize to your needs. Having your wedding in such a unique location ensures your guests will never forget your Big Day.

Although there’s plenty of room for you to bring your own details into the mix, there isn’t much need for customization. With original woodwork and gorgeous décor, a mansion lets you forego the expense of decorations to feature the location’s natural beauty.

Raise a Glass

Create a classy event for your guests with a wedding at a winery. Wineries combine a rustic vibe with elegant décor to create a rich experience. Many wineries allow ceremonies to be held in the vineyard itself followed by a reception in the winery. This gives couples the option to have two different looks, an outdoor ceremony and an indoor reception, without traveling to a second location.

Working vineyards come complete with tanks and a barrel room, which allows your guests to experience the whole process. Just imagine having your pictures taken in a rustic barrel room or running through the vineyard. It’s like your own little Tuscan escape.

Explore the City

Surrounded by skyscrapers and beaches, we are lucky to have the options Chicago offers us. In addition to many iconic spots throughout the city, there are also hidden gems that incorporate the aesthetic of nature alongside an urban oasis. For couples who feel a deep connection to Chicago (if you have ever considered a tattoo of the Chicago flag), utilizing the city as your venue is the ideal fit.

Wide Open Spaces

If you are looking for a way to escape the hustle and bustle of the city, consider heading to the outskirts of town for a rustic barn wedding. There is a multitude of options when it comes to finding a barn or farm space within driving distance of the Chicagoland area. The magnificent landscapes that accompany a rural setting allow for an array of options for your photographer. With our always-changing weather, a barn will provide both indoor and outdoor options to accommodate any last-minute showers or flurries. Some venues have outdoor fire pits and open areas that allow your guests the opportunity to roast marshmallows or play a game of bags during cocktail hour.

The beauty of a barn is that it is a blank slate with antique undertones. The aged wooden beams tell a rustic story, while modern touches such as the décor you choose can add a personalized flair. Many couples who decide to utilize a barn often keep with the antique or rustic theme and incorporate vintage touches such as mismatched china, strands of lights to create ambiance, and burlap table runners.

No matter what your style is, it’s important to select a venue that speaks to you. Pick a place where you feel comfortable with the staff and confident your wedding will be perfect.

Written by Katie O’Shaughnessy

Making Your Wedding A Night to Remember

You’re on fire with all this wedding planning stuff! You can visualize your dream dress, you have tentatively chosen your florist and you may have to check out that bakery just one more time to make sure it’s absolutely perfect even though you’ve already eaten two entire cakes.

Everything will be perfect for you because it’s your day and it’s all about you! Right?

Wrong. Well, at least partly wrong. Your wedding should be among the best days of your life, but your enjoyment isn’t the only important thing of the day. Your guests, your most fervent supporters, are coming out en masse to celebrate your union. You owe it to them to make it one of the greatest days of their lives too.

Get Them Jazzed

Pump up some anticipation by creating a website for your wedding. Include the web address on your Save the Date and update the page regularly as your planning goes along. With pictures of your first dates to photos of the proposal, you can catch up with your friends and family who haven’t yet heard your heartwarming story. If you are feeling particularly ambitious, write a series of blog entries. Your guests will be happily involved as they read about your dress fittings and taste testings. But be careful not to give away too many spoilers. You still want their jaws to drop in awe on the day of the wedding.

Create an interactive experience to customize your party to your guests. Add polls regarding food options and signature drinks. Take song requests to pass on to the DJ. Most importantly, post hotel options and an itinerary so everyone knows where to be and when.

Location

Try to keep your sites as local as possible. Your guests don’t want a two-hour drive between the ceremony and reception; if possible, do both parts at the same venue. After the ceremony, your party need only focus on their elation and securing their favorite mixed drink.

Before your invitations hit the postal service, drive from the ceremony site to the reception venue. Did you get lost anywhere en route? Was there a confusing detour? When you do send out your invitations, be sure to include clear directions that take construction and traffic into account.

Perfect Timing

If both parts of your wedding are at the same venue, send your guests directly into a cocktail hour and begin the wedding about an hour later. This keeps everything moving quickly but allows time for a receiving line and for your dress to be bustled.

When travel between locations is involved, allow plenty of time for your guests to get there and have a cocktail hour scheduled for shortly after their arrival. That way they don’t have to go out of their way to find entertainment in the interim.

If you want to spend some time on photographs, schedule carefully so that you can still make it to the cocktail hour as a lot of couples underestimate how long is needed between events.

A Toast to the Party Ahead

Remember that the cocktail party isn’t just a way to stall guests as you have your pictures taken. It’s a time for you to kick off the party. With this in mind, make sure that you are as prompt as possible so you can have a private sneak peek of your venue and have time to begin greeting your guests.

Although the cocktail party doesn’t require as much foresight as the reception, there should never be grumbling bellies. Think of the cocktail hour as the last chance to pump up the excitement. one option is to utilize hors d’oeuvre stations as they not only provide delicious bites for your guests, but they keep guests moving around and mingling with one another.

Since the dancing hasn’t kicked off yet, you will need another form of entertainment. Since many couples do not have the budget to hire a band to play all evening, opting for a band during cocktail hour and a DJ for dinner and dancing is a popular compromise. Setting up a slide show or a picture table is an easy and inexpensive way for guests to have something to look at before your reception begins.

Throw a Reception to Remember

Don’t give Jeff, the groom’s best college friend, 45 minutes to give his speech. No one thinks he’s as funny as your new husband does. Limit two or three speakers to five minutes each so guests don’t have to wonder at the appropriateness of certain inside jokes as their stomachs cave in on themselves. Take the time to personally thank your guests for coming out to celebrate you and your love. if you weren’t able to get to everyone at the cocktail hour, circle the room and say hi to each table.

Consider every aspect of your guests’ comfort. Leave a basket of one-size-fits-all flip flops near the dance floor so everyone can jam without worrying about their new stellar stilettos. If it’s an outdoor wedding, provide shawls, fans, heaters and a hardly-roughing-it bathroom trailer.

As the tunes get going, ask the DJ not to drown out conversation, especially during dinner. It’s not a club; it’s a fancy wedding. Grandma doesn’t want to bump and grind, and your hip friends don’t want to square dance. Find music that’s SFW and pleases everyone.

It’s your wedding and it should reflect the unique personalities of you and your brand-spankin’-new spouse. If your guests can say, “oh, that’s so them!” they’ll remember it forever. If you and your spouse are sports fans, utilizing pictures of past and present players of your favorite team as a table centerpiece is a great way to incorporate your individual style. Want to add a little wow factor? Consider hiring your team’s mascot to come at the end of your wedding to greet guests. Have fun with your theme while staying true to who you are as a couple. if you don’t want to spend a lot of money on flowers or centerpieces, consider bringing in additional lighting and sound systems to incorporate a visual experience for your guests.

You have already tested all the food to ensure you’re feeding your guests only the highest quality fare. Hopefully you also read reviews online so you know your vendors will provide smooth service. Make sure to hire servers that introduce themselves to your guests (bonus if your bartenders can remember names)! This added layer of customer service will make your guests feel extra special and welcome.

If you are thinking about a cash bar, we need to stop you right there. Your guests bought you a gift, blocked out a whole day to devote to you and they may even be shelling out to stay the night. Buy them a drink. Even providing a limited selection of beer and wine is better than asking them to pay.

Snack Attack

At the end of the night, feet are aching and heads are spinning from the drinks that you provided (see above); your guests are going to need some munchies. PSA: only time reduces the effect of alcohol but the addition of extra goodies is always appreciated. Another great way to help your guests is to provide a shuttle service to the hotel.

Schedule reinforcement food to arrive a little over an hour before the wedding ends. Stick with your theme if you have one. Mini versions of a couple’s favorite foods are always a crowd pleaser as guests love to see the connection between what is being served and the couple. Think mini burger, mini hotdogs, or even popcorn. Other popular options are ordering pizza (ahead of time of course) or hiring a food truck to show up outside. Ask your venue if they have a menu of late night snacks for an easier option as many venues have separate options for late night food and hors d’oeuvres. Make it personal by bringing in outside food from places that are important to you. Whether it’s sweets from the cupcake shop you two frequented in your early days or pizza from his cousin’s local parlor, it brings something special into play just when everyone thought all the excitement was over.

Favors give your guests a reminder of your Big Day. A lot of couples set up candy buffets as they take the place of a sweets table and they can be used as favors. Truly a win-win!

It Doesn’t End There

After your Big Day there is still work to be done. Once the gifts have been opened and a few relaxing days have gone by, it’s time to start writing those thank-you notes. Make sure each one is personalized with a heartfelt note that shows your appreciation for their presence and, of course, their present.

Yes, this takes a long time. Yes, you have to do it. Split it 50/50 with your loving partner and break it up over a couple of weeks. A few a day won’t kill you. After all, every single person who showed up deserves your gratitude as much as you deserve theirs after throwing such a scintillating soirée!

Written by Katie O’Shaughnessy

A Rehearsal Dinner Guide

You have spent months planning this amazing party. Every box has been checked, every flower ordered, and every name card has a place, but there’s just one thing left to organize: the rehearsal dinner. This is definitely a common tradition that cannot be skipped, unless you want the groomsmen trying to figure out what they are supposed to be doing on the fly.

Rehearsal dinners are the perfect place to have a little fun and relieve some stress before the Big Day. For once, someone else will be telling you where to go and how things should run.

At least for the rehearsal part.

Who Does the Guest List Include?

First thing’s first: the guest list. Before picking a venue or choosing a menu, decide who should be a part of this evening besides the bridal party.

There are no rules! Other than members of the wedding party, who typically bring a spouse or guest, out-of-town guests are generally invited since they have traveled for the special occasion. The officiant and the immediate families of the bride and groom also attend. Your guest list really depends on the budget and on how big of a soirée you would like. Have a conversation with whomever is footing the bill to determine how large the guest list should be.

Who Pays?

Traditionally, the groom’s parents host the rehearsal dinner. Nowadays, more and more couples are deciding they can pay for the dinner themselves with maybe a little help from Mom and Dad. If the families both feel strongly about helping host the dinner, let them split the bill. Just make sure they are aware of how many guests you want to attend and the type of venue you’ve chosen.

How Formal Should the Dinner Be?

It generally depends on the preference of the couple. Typically, if a couple is having a formal wedding, the rehearsal dinner will be a more casual, laid-back event. Just because an event is casual, does not mean you need to forgo formal elements. This is an opportune moment for the families to spend some quality time together before all of the excitement begins for the Big Day. However, you don’t want your rehearsal dinner to compete with your wedding reception.

Some couples opt for low-key venues such as someone’s backyard or even a bowling alley. It will vary based on how intimate you would like the atmosphere to be. You want your guests to be relaxed and enjoy themselves, especially since most of them won’t know each other and it’s a smaller event than your actual wedding.

Where Should I Host the Dinner?

Location may be one of the easiest choices to make. Pick something that is the most convenient for you and your guests. This will make it less stressful on the bridal party and immediate family. Most will want to relax after the ceremony rehearsal and not spend a good chunk of time carpooling to the next location. Unless you are dead set on hosting your dinner at a certain venue, find someplace within walking distance or a very short car trip of where the ceremony will be held.

When Should I Start Planning the Dinner?

It is suggested to book a rehearsal dinner location within a few months of deciding on your wedding venue. Since many restaurants host both weddings and rehearsal dinners, desired dates often book up quickly. To stay on schedule, have a general idea of who is attending by about three months out.

Should I Serve Cake?

How do I choose the menu: Many couples opt for serving a meal that will not be duplicated at their wedding. Family style is a popular choice as it brings in a relaxed and casual feel to the meal which often correlates to a rehearsal dinner. Additionally, choosing family-style does not require guests to decide on their meal ahead of time which often feels like hosting a second wedding. Since most couples serve cake at their wedding, the rehearsal dinner is the perfect time to try something different.

What About Toasts and Gifts?

The rehearsal dinner is a perfect place for the couple to address friends and family to thank them for the time spent in helping make the upcoming day so special. This is also a great time to thank the bridal party for their involvement. If the groom’s family is hosting, it’s expected that they will give a speech. The bride’s parents can also say a few words if they feel prompted.

If you don’t have time to add a little something extra to the schedule for the wedding, get creative and set aside some time to have it at the rehearsal dinner. This could include slideshows of the couple, any sort of readings, or just fun stories family and friends want to share.

Most couples choose this time to hand out bridal party favors and sometimes a gift of appreciation for Mom and Dad. Bridesmaid gifts can be as simple as jewelry or as elaborate as a bridesmaid’s bag, which includes essentials like tissues, lip gloss, and a robe for getting ready. Groomsmen gifts can range from cufflinks to a grooming kit. It is up to the discretion of the couple on how much they want to spend on their respective parties.

What about Decorating the Venue for the Rehearsal Dinner?

Décor should never compete with your reception, but if you like to decorate, decorate away! Many couples use their rehearsal dinner to highlight their story vs. highlighting a general theme.

If you choose to host it outside, hanging lights could be an intimate, classic option. Long tables are recommended to encourage a family-style meal setting. If your event is very casual and the venue is already beautiful, you won’t have to prepare any decorations or spend the time setting up. Place cards are unnecessary unless you would like to ensure people mingle with guests they don’t know.

What about Alcohol?

Should we pay for an open bar? Alcohol can be expensive, so it depends on who is paying for the evening. You can choose not to have an open bar and if you would like to offer alcohol to your guests, you can speak with the venue to see about packages.

Some hosts will offer to pick up the tab for beer and wine while guests are responsible for purchasing mixed drinks if they want them. Never feel obligated to provide alcohol. Don’t forget, you are already paying for their meal tonight. Some may choose to not have alcohol because they don’t want things to get too rowdy, especially with the bridal party who have to be up and at ’em early the next day.

Should my Photographer Attend the Rehearsal Dinner?

If you have a little extra wiggle room in your budget, you may choose to have the photographer capture some precious moments of family and friends at the rehearsal dinner. Some photographers prefer to attend the rehearsal because it gives them a chance to find the best angles to shoot the bridal party, especially the bride and groom. It is also nice to have more candid photos of the dinner and guests mingling as extra mementos.

Plus, if you have a large family, you can get photos with everyone with the extra time. Yes, even Uncle Stan! That way you don’t have to spend too much time worrying about scheduling all of the photos during the reception when you are trying to visit with everyone. Not many couples choose to do this, but if it’s something you can afford, go for it.

Remember, the night before your wedding should be relaxed and stress-free. The dinner is meant to be a time for family members and friends to come together to celebrate the joining of two families. Take the time to plan something that feels right for you and your significant other without trying to top what you have planned for the Big Day.

Written by Lynn Tangorra

How to Give the Perfect Wedding Toast

When it comes to public speaking there are typically two schools of thought; either we don’t mind it or the thought of speaking in front of others is what fuels our nightmares. Traditionally the father of the bride and groom would give a toast at the reception, but with wedding traditions evolving over the years, giving a toast is fair game to all. If you have been bestowed the honor of giving a toast at an upcoming nuptial, no need to panic. By following our no-fail guide, you will confidently be able to give a toast worth bragging about.

Plan Accordingly.

When giving speeches in any capacity, it is always suggested to plan ahead and skip the “wing it” mentality. Give yourself plenty of time to collect your thoughts, write down what you would like to convey, and practice as much as possible. Allowing ample time to practice will help build confidence and erase any pre-speech jitters that might be lingering. Practicing will also ensure that should you forget your beloved notecard at home, you will still have enough memorized to make it through the entirety of your toast without bumbling along.

Speak Appropriately.

Prior to standing up and regurgitating a tacky story about you and the bride from your college days, it is advised to find out who will be in your audience. Typically, older family members will be in attendance which warrants a touch of conservatism in terms of the topics that you include in your speech. If you are not sure who the guest list will consist of, always air on the side of caution and use the “would I say this in front of my grandparents?” rule of thumb.

Remain Optimistic.

Wedding toasts are not the time to air any dirty laundry between you and the newly wedded couple. Despite any bumps in the road that might have taken place between you and the bride and groom, using your toast as a platform to discuss these hurdles (despite a positive outcome) is not appropriate. Use this time to highlight positive memories and optimism for a future full of love and happiness.

Hold Off.

Despite the fact that several glasses of wine might seem like an easy way to chase off any pre-speech jitters, there is nothing more cringeworthy than listening to a drunken toast. Refrain from drinking until after your speech to ensure that your words are not slurred, your posture is not wobbly, and your overall demeanor is not sloppy. With social media being such an easily accessible option for your audience, nothing would be worse than waking up the next morning to find yourself tagged in multiple videos highlighting the fact that you enjoyed one too many of the couple’s signature cocktail.

Be You.

If profanity is a part of your daily vocabulary, making slight adjustments to your natural vocabulary is recommended prior to standing in front of others to make a toast. While you do not want to sound like someone else, you do want to make sure that what is being said is appropriate for all. Don’t spend time thumbing through a thesaurus in order to swap-out your own words in order to come across differently. There is a reason why you were asked to give a toast; there is history, trust, and admiration between you and changing that would be a disservice to your relationship.

Remain Respectful.

While you and the happy couple might love reliving stories from your childhood, be mindful of the audience and the fact that all that stands between them and their meal is the conclusion of your toast. Aim for under five minutes as the attention span of those who are hungry and wanting to eat is limited.

The Basics.

If you are unsure how to format a toast, try to include a beginning, middle, and an end to keep your thoughts organized. Many will begin by introducing themselves and explaining their relation to the bride and groom. Being mindful and thanking the couple and their families for including you into their Big Day is always appreciated. After including a story, a memory, or even a quote that relates to the couple, conclude by turning to the audience and requesting they join you in raising their glasses to toast the newlyweds. Throughout the duration of your toast, make sure and stand tall, smile, and establish eye contact as your confidence will visually radiate through your body language.

Written by Lauren Beers | Photography by Erin Hoyt Photography

Written by Laura Wrasman, Regional Publisher, Chicago Style Weddings

I was lucky enough to visit the brand new Royalton Suites Cancun Resort & Spa. It is a fabulous, newly built property with stunning views of the water. This resort offers full wedding amenities and makes a romantic honeymoon destination. Whether you like sun, fun, scuba, hiking, or discovering (or a combination of these!), this resort offers it all. I stayed on the Lucky 13th floor, so here’s 13 reasons why you should experience this resort!

1. Upon arrival, I was whisked into a special room as I was informed I am part of the Diamond Club. The Diamond Club gives you access to exclusive amenities and upper level suite rooms with a private butler. I was given a wrist medallion, which became my key card for entry into my hotel suite. This truly was one of my favorite things, as I never had to remember to grab a key card or run to the lobby because I forgot mine! The color of the tie indicated which inclusivity level I was part of.
2. I opened the door to my room and was in awe! The room was beautifully designed and the view was breathtaking. I truly was lucky to be on the 13th floor. The beds were the most comfortable I’ve ever slept in and I had the choice of four different pillow types! The room was equipped with Wi-Fi and charging stations, and even had a charging station inside the closet safe. Each room has its own private balcony, where we enjoyed the champagne that was waiting in our room for us upon arrival. We were lucky to be able to view a stunning sunrise from our balcony every morning.
3. The hotel is very eco-friendly. Within the rooms, there are no paper menus—everything is accessible through the TV. You can order room service, as well as contact your personal butler! When you open the sliding glass door to the balcony, the air conditioning turns itself off to conserve resources.
4. Outside, there’s water everywhere—beautiful pools and white sand beaches! The Royalton faces the ocean on one side and a lagoon on the other, so all rooms have water views.
5. One of my favorite places was Level 18—the rooftop cabana lounge. With panoramic views of the most beautiful sight-lines in Cancun, this exclusive adults-only level features rooftop pools, elegant cabanas and modern dining. At night, the pulsing lights of the kaleidoscope bar make for a magical night club experience. The entertainment was terrific—fire jugglers, silk acrobatics and stilt-walking beauties made the night club come alive!
6. As an avid work out girl, I was excited to hear about the Royalton Fit Club. I was able to take a boot camp class on the beach, workout in their well-equipped gym overlooking a white sand beach, make a fool out of myself in beach Zumba and get a great stretch during rooftop yoga. The instructors were first class and adjusted well for the participants’ different fitness levels.
7. I was lucky enough to receive an aromatic massage at the Royal Spa. I’ve had many massages, but this one was amazing with the addition of five different aromatics throughout the massage. It was just awesome to the senses!
8. Another offering in the spa that I had never experienced was hydrotherapy. The hydrotherapy pool was warm—not as warm as a hot tub—and had a very hard jets of water that focused on your head, back and shoulders. It was almost like getting a massage all over again.
9. The Royalton Suites Cancun is an all-inclusive resort, so almost everything is included, with upgrades in some areas and the spa being an extra. All the amenities were first class and nothing felt watered down or skimped on.
10. The food at the resort was outstanding. I’ve never seen such a wide variety of offerings both in their restaurants and their buffet. Three different restaurants offered a variety of fare, from Japanese to steak to seafood. The buffet was unlike any buffet I’ve ever seen, with chefs offering everything from custom egg dishes to omelette bars to smoothie stations—anything you yearned for you could have.
11. The staff at the hotel was generous, friendly and very attentive. They were always where they needed to be, but were very non-invasive. We had a personal butler on the upper floors that we could contact at any time. They even brought special treats in the afternoon before dinner. They were always very helpful and willing to go the extra mile.
12. There are many excursions available from the Royalton so you can see more of Cancun and the surrounding area. We went on a catamaran cruise to Isla Mujeres and made a stop to snorkel along the way. The water was beautifully clear and we saw schools of colorful fish and even a stingray in the waters. We had lunch on the island and enjoyed shopping in the fun boutiques and bargaining with the shop owners.
13. By far, my favorite thing about this resort was how everything came together to make it such a romantic destination. The hotel, the beach, the rooftop and the food were so well done, and everything felt like it would be wonderful to share with just that right person. Along with honeymoons, the resort offers wedding packages. I can just imagine a ceremony on the beach, or even on the rooftop. Such beautiful backdrops!

Savvy Rose Events delivered delightfully vibrant, tropical vibes with a styled shoot at Gallery 1500 that has all the destination wedding ambiance without ever leaving Chicago. All photos by Amanda Mae Visuals.

When planning a Chicago wedding, good weather is always on the wish list. Midwesterners know all too well the stress of coordinating their nuptials on a day that has a mild forecast. This tropical wedding styled shoot was the perfect way to welcome warmer weather!

Savvy Rose Events put together this tropical dream with lots of bright, vibrant colors contrasted with soft tones. This shoot included plenty of little details which really made it come to life. From the lovely invitation suite to the stunning cake, everything enhanced this tropical and traditional vibe. The bright blooms were just right, decoratively enhancing the head table and creating a striking bouquet and boutonniere. The bubbly wall was a fun addition, making for cute photo opportunities as well as a potential interactive experience for guests. We don’t see a lot of tropical-styled weddings here in Chicago, but this gorgeous styled photo shoot is the perfect inspiration for couples looking to plan something unique!

Vendors:

 Venue: Gallery 1500, Photography: Amanda Mae Visuals, Event Planner: Savvy Rose Events, Florals: Aysel Cristian Floral Atelier, Design & Rentals: Rustique Swan, Cake: Spencer Trygve Cakes, Desserts: XO Marshmallow, Stationery: Emery Ann Design, Bubbly Wall: The Bubbly Truck, Bride’s Gown: Vanessa’s Modern Bride, Formalwear: The Groomsman Suit, Food Styling: Happy Jaks, Hair: Korena Robinson, Makeup: Manifest Makeup, Jewelry: Mel Joy Creations, Models: Carla Nasui; Walker D. Van Dixhorn

Ready to start planning your own Big Day? Check out our expert advice, stunning real weddings, and follow us on Pinterest for the ultimate inspiration.  

Grooms may not have to buy a wedding gown, but they still have some important (and difficult!) decisions to make when it comes to finding the right suit, belt and shoes. The formalwear experts from The Groomsman Suit popped by the blog to discuss all things suiting and to answer one of the most confusing questions— what color shoes does a man wear with a navy suit?

There is so much to think about when it comes to selecting your wedding day look. While many might think the groom has it the easiest, and wonder, “what’s so difficult about selecting a suit?” There is actually quite a bit that goes into selecting the groom’s suit or tuxedo and the complementing accessories. Men’s suiting is one of the most challenging wardrobe items for a gentleman to purchase, especially when trying to achieve a proper fit. And after fit, the finishing details of the look must be determined— which can be a whole other challenge in itself!

Choose Your Color

When it comes to the groom’s look, usually the first step is to select the perfect suit (or tuxedo) in a color to complement the bride-to-be and all of the fine details of the wedding day. Your bride has likely told you just a little bit about her gown. Possibly she’s said, “It’s ivory, floor length, and has Alencon lace detailing.” You might be thinking, “Well, that doesn’t tell me too much,” but actually there are some key statements in this seemingly small set of information. Floor length, as opposed to knee length or tea length, indicates a certain level of formality.  A floor length gown is more formal than the alternatives. This doesn’t mean you must run out and purchase a tuxedo for the Big Day, but there are some other details that you must consider before settling on your suiting. These include the time of day that the event will take place, the season and the venue.

Choose Your Shoes

The second, and equally important, part of your wedding day look planning is the shoes and accessories. Your shoe selection must be carefully considered as shoes typically anchor the look along with the tie and pocket square selections. As a default, most gentlemen think that a navy suit should be paired with tan or brown shoes. In some instances, particularly for outdoor and more rustic weddings, this is a fine choice. But in more formal weddings, brown shoes might make the groom appear as if he is going to the office rather than getting married. Often overlooked by grooms and groomsmen is a black wholecut oxford or cap toe oxford which can be a sharp complement to the navy suit. Black shoes paired with a navy suit provide a certain level of sophistication and formality that is not necessarily as apparent with brown shoes. This combo tends to be more appropriate for evening weddings and weddings that take place in the fall and winter in cooler climates. Keep in mind there are no hard rules when it comes to selecting shoes, but some choices may be more suitable than others.

Choose Your Belt

Now what about a belt? Should you wear a belt for your Big Day? We say yes, but only if you are wearing a suit. Belts should never be worn with tuxedo pants. To make sure you don’t make this mistake, our tuxedo pants don’t even come with belt loops! Belts are one of those accessories that are both fashionable and functional.  We recommend that once you settle on a shoe color, you match your belt color to the shoes. Again, not a rule, but this makes things much more streamlined for a wedding day look.

As you plan your wedding day look, the pros at The Groomsman Suit are here to help you to consider all the details of your wedding day to settle on the best suit and accessory styles and colors. It’s important that you don’t make these decisions in a vacuum. You and your bride-to-be should look like you are going to the same party, no exceptions. And selecting your wedding day apparel should not be a chore. We want to ensure that you feel great about what you are wearing for the big day and share in the excitement about the look that you select. If for any reason you get stumped, our stylists are always here to help!

The Groomsman Suit created a new solution for black tie attire: a sharp-looking tuxedo that could be purchased for less than the cost of a traditional rental. Check out their site for style inspiration and a wide variety of formalwear options!